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Wednesday, July 25, 2007
met jilyn todae after visiting the doctor's.. hah.. she was pretty nicely dolled up while i was shabbily dressed.. ha.. kinda ashamed of myself.. anyways she was going to je to take the train while i was goin to get my concession renewed.. so we took the bus over to je together.. although i onli realised she was at the bus stop when the bus arrived.. i was standing outside the bus stop wondering if i was going to meet her or whether i shld call her n stuff.. since i knew she lives there n wld b in the vicinity by probability.. ha.. but i was still rather surprised when i saw her...
anyways juz watched another episode of the 'le femme' something.. hah.. the hong kong serial 'nu ren bu yi zhuo' la.. in this episode.. jing liang has finally been pushed to the limit by hai qiao n decides to accept his 'fate' which is to be a bad person.. becoz when he tries to be a good guy n loves hai qiao.. all he gets is doubt n bad treatment.. evryone in the world thinks hes a bad guy n doesnt seem to belive that he cld ever turn over a new leaf..
i want to talk abt this is becoz i feel so much abt him.. hah.. i feel that i've been thru the same mindset that he went thru.. to think that being a gd guy is stupid.. n that its my nature to b bad.. to b evil.. but of coz theres alot of different variables for me to pull n tug me in n out of this mindset.. n therefore it has not made much of an impact to me yet i suppose.. whilst jing liang has started his 'revenge' n does a lot of so called 'despicable' things to do so.. which brings me to think that 'despicable' juz means acquiring something wif wit... it juz means using the simplest methods or the unorthodox, available options to get the job done.. in certain regards of things.. there realli is no such thing as morally correct.. it is all juz a mindset.. a way in which the society accepts as correct.. which was probably y i've also had many occasions of despising the fellow human race.. of coz i mite also b despising myself or shld i say im onli juz despising myself.. but i realli cant accept the fact that certain pple who r deemed to b the 'gd guys' can use despicable means n ways to get the job done but yet they r still deemed correct juz becoz they r using them against the so called 'despicable' pple.. im not thinking seriously abt this at the moment so i'l juz stop here.. hah.. juz wanted to say that being a gd guy is the worst thing to b.. being a bad guy who wants to turn over a new leaf is stupid.. being a bad guy wld require lots of carefulness.. n being a gd guy who does bad things is the onli way to get a gd life in this society if u mind wat other pple think abt u... haha.. i mind the most abt this thats y...